Power, Privilege and Perspective

Responding to Charlottesville and other disturbing recent events, I explored the principles of a nonviolent approach to issues of race, privilege and power during our Wednesday morning practice group last week.The experience left me feeling...

Making Peace with Fear

Gandhi once said, “The enemy is fear. We think it is hate; but, it is fear.” Last week, people from both our Wednesday and Saturday practice groups asked questions about working with their fears.People spoke about everything from the fear of nuclear war and...

Triggered, but Conscious!

Showing up like a grown-up is so challenging when we are triggered.I was recently reminded of this when something unexpected happened in an important relationship, and I felt that intense WHOOSH rush up through me.An unwelcome visitor to my inner sense of...

Falling in the Dark: Presence and Balance

When I tripped over a chair in the dark a few nights ago,And somersaulted my landing, and woke up to a very stiff and sore body for the last week,I wasn’t really all that surprised.It felt quite symbolic really:Falling in the dark.Being brought to my knees.Finally,...

Growing Shame? Do This Instead.

Last week, my compulsive “yesses” caught up with me in a major way.Stretched far too thin, I dropped the ball in a number of places:I wasn’t as present to my friends as I wanted to beMy patience was running on empty in my parentingI wasn’t able to meet deadlines that...

Red Pen or Yellow Highlighter?

While grading papers for a graduate class I’m teaching at St. Mary’s University recently, I realized my approaching to “grading” has fundamentally transformed since I began teaching in the mid-1990’s. It’s become much more gentle. I used to read with an...

The Problem with Diagnoses

Last week, a leader called me to discuss a conflict that had arisen on her team.One of her team members had challenged a decision made by a colleague, who in turn responded with indignation and intensity.Sparks flew, tears flowed and everyone else at the meeting...

Too Emotional?

While helping a senior level executive think through some bristly team dynamics recently, she told me that “the problem” was that some team members were simply “too emotional.” She related an incident in which a direct report became teary in...

Hopeless and Happy: Powerful Presence

While facilitating some empathy skills training recently, I was reminded of a powerful lesson.(I learn so much from each of you!)Participants were paired off, practicing their empathy skills, when a pair called me over for some coaching and input.Although they were...
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